On December 26, 2016 I got aboard a train in Seattle headed to Sacramento. Where, 21 hours later, I was going to meet my girlfriend for the first time. I was going to spend 11 days with her. I will admit to some apprehension. I’ve had first meetings go sideways before, but none of those were like what Melissa and I already had.
The train trip itself down to California, was pretty cool. I was seated next to Karen. A lovely woman from Eugene, Oregon. She was originally from Denmark, so I actually had quite a bit to talk to her about, as I had spent many hours around Danes. 🙂 I did not need my mp3 player until she got off the train many hours later. I even got a hug.
Also of note, I was not the only transwoman on the train. There was one other (that I saw) and she commented on my purple/burgundy outfit, so that was nice. It looked like she was with 3 or 4 other people, so I didn’t wind up talking to her at all.
Dinner was interesting, as I had decided to partake of the dining car reservation. When I got to the table, there was already a gentleman seated ahead of me. It was quickly apparent that he was not very social. We exchanged names, and destinations. After a bit I tried to initiate conversation again, and we had a very stilted conversation about Vancouver.
Thankfully, a couple (man and woman) got seated with us pretty quick. They were much more chatty. They were from Oregon as well, and it seems I tend to get along really well with people from there. Must be a forest/coastal/ocean thing. Conversation went from Canada/US differences, to local govt infrastructure idiocy. Dinner was really good, but portions were smallish, and VERY expensive.
I managed to get a little bit of sleep on the train, and the rest of the trip was mostly me watching Monty Python on my Sony Walkman.
I arrived in Sacramento about half an hour before I was supposed to. Luckily Melissa is like me, and likes to arrive places half an hour ahead of time, otherwise we feel late. So, she actually showed up about 5 minutes after I got outside the station (as I was trying to find wifi to send her a message).
My face must have lit up when I saw her, but it was very cold, and I was so tired, so we only managed a hug before getting into the warm car. It was at this point that I knew this was going to work. Without ever having been around her before, it all just felt so comfortable. I slid my hand across to her thigh, as we drove to get some breakfast.
The 13 days went by so fast, but I feel we got a lot out of them. We saw Star Wars Rogue One in IMAX 3D, saw Cirque Du Soleil: Luzia in San Fransisco, had ostrich burgers at Fudruckers, walked a bit around the San Fran waterfront, ate a lot of amazing home cooked meals (Melissa is a wonderful cook), gamed together, slept together, showered together, but more important than any of that, is we got to touch.
We are so completely compatible. We are so incomprehensibly similar, and yet any differences we have are perfectly synergistic. It’s like we were made for each other. Even after dating for a few months now, we both marvel at how good we are for each other.
I cried a lot on the last day. I didn’t want to leave. Maybe it was a good thing the train coming home was so horrendously late, and that I didn’t sleep well on it. I was over tired, and the tears seemed to stop. The last few nights have been tearful though. I figured this would happen after finally being with her. I’m prepared for it, and I’ll continue to cry, because it’s how I deal with it. I have amazing friends that will distract me from missing her as much as I do. And of course, we talk every day.
Neither of us knows what our future is. Nothing can be figured out until we’ve both had our surgeries. Until then, since we both identify as non-monogamous, we’ll try and find other partners that are close for now, probably just casual things. That being said, we will be together sooner than later. Where? Who knows at this point. I’m willing to move to her. She’s willing to move to me. Whichever makes more sense when the time comes.